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Volestranglers Systematic Rhyming Remedies

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  • Volestranglers Systematic Rhyming Remedies

    Hi,
    I've decided that it is time is right to announce a medical breakthrough in alternative/complimentary treatments.

    Let me introduce Volestranglers Systematic Rhyming Remedies.

    The idea is that a minor celebrity had a niggling illness which defeated the attention of conventional and all the hitherto alternative/complimentary medicines available. But was finally cured by 'Volestranglers Systematic Rhyming Remedies'.

    The treatment is simple.
    You find something that rhymes with the illness, hold it in your hand and concentrate on it while saying the rhyme.

    For more aggressive treatment Stanza therapy is recommended

    Believe me it really works!
    After many years of extensive research 'proving' the rhymes with varying illnesses, meter, timbre and intonation came the breakthrough in treatment that is set to shake the world.

    Send £25 for a list of illnesses and Rhyme treatments.
    If after 28 days you are not delighted you can try and get your money back.

    I am setting up internet based training sessions on becoming a franchised Volestrangler therapist.

    If anyone would like to buy the foreign language rites we can negotiate a franchise.

    Note this is serious and not just a ploy to make money so that I don't have to be a pharmacist anymore.
    Last edited by Pharmanaut; 28, October 2006, 12:33 AM. Reason: for a laugh
    47 BC : Julius Cesar : Veni Vidi Vici : I came, I saw I conquered.
    2018 AD : Modern Man : I shopped, I clicked, I collected.
    How times change.

    If you find you have read something that has upset or offended you an anyway please unread it at once.

  • #2
    Sounds as plausible as BAch flower remedies or Homeopathy. I'm in!
    Linnear MRPharmS

    Foetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder: The biggest cause of brain damage and 100% preventable.

    In pregnancy: 1 fag is not safe, 1 x-ray is not safe and 1 drink is not safe.



    For handy pharmacy links try
    pharmacistance.co.uk

    If you like my posts or letters in the journal try my books!
    eloquent-e-tales

    Comment


    • #3
      Vsrr

      Originally posted by Linnear View Post
      Sounds as plausible as BAch flower remedies or Homeopathy. I'm in!
      Right,
      I'll get the ceremonial robes, incantations and stylophone in the post to you.
      As a 'novice' you will need to send £25 registration.
      47 BC : Julius Cesar : Veni Vidi Vici : I came, I saw I conquered.
      2018 AD : Modern Man : I shopped, I clicked, I collected.
      How times change.

      If you find you have read something that has upset or offended you an anyway please unread it at once.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Pharmanaut View Post
        Note this is serious and not just a ploy to make money so that I don't have to be a pharmacist anymore.
        Please tell me that you are NOT serious and that you don't really believe
        that repeating a rhyme can actually treat an illness

        On the other hand, let me know if you need something that rhymes with "Angina"
        "Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake" Napoleon Bonaparte

        Comment


        • #5
          Now you've got me hunting for words that rhyme with "erysipelas", "pityriasis versicolor", "New-variant Creutzfeld-Jakob" and "osteomalacia deformans"...
          Answers on a postcard please!
          Ze genuine Article, present & perfect!

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Zoggite View Post
            "New-variant Creutzfeld-Jakob"
            NVCJD? come on you're taking the piss :-)

            Jeff

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by RXJOE View Post
              Please tell me that you are NOT serious and that you don't really believe
              that repeating a rhyme can actually treat an illness

              On the other hand, let me know if you need something that rhymes with "Angina"
              Put my angina
              On a slow boat to china.

              http://www.rhymezone.com/r/rhyme.cgi...rg1=syl&org2=l
              47 BC : Julius Cesar : Veni Vidi Vici : I came, I saw I conquered.
              2018 AD : Modern Man : I shopped, I clicked, I collected.
              How times change.

              If you find you have read something that has upset or offended you an anyway please unread it at once.

              Comment


              • #8
                At first sight this could be a challenge for VSRR...

                Originally posted by Jeff View Post
                NVCJD? come on you're taking the piss :-)

                Jeff
                This did leave the 'grand master' of VSRR puzzled for a moment, but like all great systems of therapy the answer that works is often the simplest....

                Only have to find a rhyme for "Dee" so that's not much of a challenge.

                NVCJD
                Leave me free.
                47 BC : Julius Cesar : Veni Vidi Vici : I came, I saw I conquered.
                2018 AD : Modern Man : I shopped, I clicked, I collected.
                How times change.

                If you find you have read something that has upset or offended you an anyway please unread it at once.

                Comment


                • #9
                  How about:

                  I must avow
                  I'm no mad cow!
                  Linnear MRPharmS

                  Foetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder: The biggest cause of brain damage and 100% preventable.

                  In pregnancy: 1 fag is not safe, 1 x-ray is not safe and 1 drink is not safe.



                  For handy pharmacy links try
                  pharmacistance.co.uk

                  If you like my posts or letters in the journal try my books!
                  eloquent-e-tales

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Veterinarian Remedy

                    Originally posted by Linnear View Post
                    How about:

                    I must avow
                    I'm no mad cow!
                    Ah,
                    I see you have formed a breakaway group to treat veterinary conditions.
                    47 BC : Julius Cesar : Veni Vidi Vici : I came, I saw I conquered.
                    2018 AD : Modern Man : I shopped, I clicked, I collected.
                    How times change.

                    If you find you have read something that has upset or offended you an anyway please unread it at once.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Pharmanaut View Post
                      Ah,
                      I see you have formed a breakaway group to treat veterinary conditions.
                      Like asphyxiated rodents (vole stranglers- get it?)
                      Ze genuine Article, present & perfect!

                      Comment

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